The Bobblespeak Translations

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What They're Really Saying When They're Saying What They're Saying.

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Sunday, March 28, 2010
Meet The Press - March 28, 2010
Chuck Schumer: (D-NY)
Lindsey Graham (R-SC)
Bob Shrum
Jon Meachem
Doris Goodwin
Mike Murphy
*************************

Gregory: Chuck AT&T proved this week that
I was right all along - people are going to lose
their insurance!

Schumer: No that’s a lie - just like death panels
and killing grandma

Gregory: Lindsey how do answer the charge
that Republicans were right?

Graham: that’s a good tough question Gregory - Democrats are eliminating Medicare, student loans, and AT&T will have stop delivering the great customer service they are known for - it’s Armeygeddon!

Gregory: so will you repeal the law?

Graham: yes we will force the Democrats to
double funding for Medicare

Schumer: ha - oh noes!

Graham: states will have empty referendums
on this bill!

Gregory: Chuck this bill costs $93 billion a year!

Schumer: that’s not very much Fluffy

Gregory: how do you answer the charge that this bill cuts the deficit but doesn’t cut it enough

Schumer: if we did nothing it would be
worse bubblehead

Gregory: the CBO, the Concord Coalition and
Count von Count from Sesame Street all say this will cut the debt - but how can that possibly be true when you cover millions of people?

Schumer: I heard you were a moron

Graham: I heard that too!

Schumer: from me

Schumer: Look Dancin’ Dave in the long run this
will cut a trillion dollars from the debt

Gregory: Chuck the middle class Americans are terrified that you will take away their health care and give it to an undeserving poor brown person

Schumer: well they’ve been fed a bunch of
bullshit for a year

Gregory: I have no idea how that could that happen in our intrepid media environment

Graham: this is a giant Ponzi scheme - this will
cut doctors!

Schumer: Good - there are a lot of crappy doctors out there x-raying people for money

Gregory: interesting

Schumer: we will discipline Doctors!

Graham: No Republican voted for this because
the CBO is full of liars!

Gregory: that’s a recent development I take it

Graham: you pay for health care with insurance payments - it’s a house of cards!

Gregory: fascinating

Graham: he’s an out-of-control leftist - he’s helped General Motors, fixed student loans and given people insurance - the GOP will not lets this
Marxist abomination stand!

Gregory: doesn’t calling Obama a Totalitarian lead to people cutting gas lines to Congressmen’s house?

Graham: well some people think it’s justified when he governs from the left ditch but you shouldn’t use the n-word

Gregory: Chuck have opponents gone
too far?

Schumer: ‘Have they’? What are you fucking nuts?? Yes Fluffy with attempted murder they have gone
too far

Graham: Democrats have poisoned the well by giving people health insurance without admitting Obama is a Kenyan Witch Doctor

Schumer: I disagree - we can have bipartisanship
on admitting only the right and good people into this country

Gregory: how do I know it’s a good idea?

Schumer: Lou Dobbs and Bill O’Reilly support it

Gregory: wow!

Graham: Recess appointments are a tool of the devil

Schumer: blow me

Graham: ok Chuck

[ break ]

Gregory: health care is a big fucking deal!

Shrum: Teddy knew it would happen

Gregory: Do we put Obama Mt. Rushmore now?

Meacham: this changes the narrative that we
talk about

Gregory: oh I see

Meacham: it also proves pundits are largely stupid

Gregory: so sad

Meacham: it’s also possible cutting gas lines and attempted murder is an overreaction to giving people health insurance

Murphy: this bill couldn’t pass a hypothetical non-existent GOP Congress

Gregory: wow

Gregory: years ago people attacked Social Security with epithets

Goodwin: a win like this emboldens a President
and a party

Gregory: but people hate this bill

Goodwin: you have to win public sentiment

Gregory: what can we learn from Obama’s failures?

Shrum: he made a lot of mistakes - but you know maybe the guy isn’t so dumb after all

Murphy: this is was a total failure of leadership - just like on Star Trek - you can’t get ahead of public opinion - you have to lead

Gregory: I want the drugs you’re on

Gregory: there’s the substance and the perception

Goodwin: we know what you care about Fluffy

Meachem: it’s terrible when John Lewis can’t walk across Capitol Hill without being spit on

Gregory: maybe the tea baggers just have bad allergies

Meachem: the tea baggers have the passion but the Progressives got this bill enacted

Goodwin: white people are terrified that black people are getting something

Gregory: the Democrats are doomed by antagonizing uneducated racists

Shrum: for god’s sake this is Mitt Romney’s bill

Murphy: no no it isn’t

Gregory: I feel something is being taken away
from me

Murphy: people hate labor but we need an agenda beyond ‘look - a black man in the white house!’

Gregory: has the Tea Party taken over the GOP?

Meacham: As Churchill once said, “What the fuck
is it with those whackjobs?”

Gregory: interesting

Meach: As Madison once said, “If men were angels, they would fly around in robes and get shot from helicopters by Sarah Palin”

Goodwin: People is mad!

Gregory: true

Goodwin: as LBJ once said, “Doris, do I look
good naked?”

Murphy: Everyone hates Obama except for Democrats, liberals, progressives, urban voters, the East coast, African-Americans, Hispanics, gays, the educated, young, students, 32 million uninsured-

Gregory: ok ok that’s all time we have